The ups and downs of a gambling enthusiast’s life are never ending. There are the good days, when chips fall from the sky and the bartenders double as runway models.
Then there are the days when it feels like every game is out to get you and an old lady is blowing smoke in your face from her oxygen tank. That’s to be expected, of course.
What isn’t part of the deal, however, are the people who make idiotic comments when you’re trying to make a cash. The ones in the background are annoying, but the ones talking to you directly are enough to make you want to strangle them.
This article lists the five most annoying casino-related phrases. I feel for you if these cliches have been overused and worn out by now.
If you’re just starting out in the gambling world, you’re going to hear these terms a lot.
The first one is “This game is rigged.”
Let’s get one thing clear: games at casinos are not fixed. The rules may be written to benefit the casino, but every client has the opportunity to review them.
Losing gamblers often console themselves with the absurd notion that the casino might cheat throughout the game. This helps people avoid taking responsibility for their own plight.
Don’t fool yourself into thinking you’re being cheated if you do nothing else. Simply accept responsibility for your actions and go on with your life.
The alcoholic beverages are gratis here,” 2. Yes!”
Whenever I hear this, I make haste to leave the area. Someone who says this is probably an alcoholic who is about to get sloppy drunk and want to start a conversation with their neighbor (you).
They don’t seem to understand that the casino’s actions have consequences. When one consumes an excessive amount of alcohol, cognitive abilities decline. When that happens, you become less capable of making sound judgments.
The sum of these benefits goes to the house. While you sip your foreign beer, the casino is sneakily emptying your pocketbook.
- “Hey man, could I borrow five dollars?” If I do well, I’ll be able to repay you.
You should never, ever, ever approach a complete stranger for a loan, no matter how bad your losing streak becomes. It’s impolite, yes, but it also makes the other person feel quite awkward.
And yet, I would wager that this has happened to me no less than six times in the last decade, and each time it has left me with a distinct memory of how humiliated I felt. You’re at least allowed to ignore a beggar while heading in a specific direction. You’re an easy target with nowhere to hide when put in this position.
The one time I ever gave someone a loan was to a beautiful woman in her thirties, and I deeply regret doing so. I was never compensated, as you probably anticipated.
It’s the same as giving food to monkeys at a zoo. If you feed one, the other will soon follow. Avoiding risk by not doing anything is preferable. After all, this is a gambling establishment, not a food pantry.
(4) “The smoke doesn’t bother you, does it?”
When an elderly lady with blue hair sits down at the slot machine next to me, I always wince. It’s not that I have anything against the elderly; I just think they might be smokers. If they are, you can bet that they won’t wait more than a few minutes before pulling out a cancer stick.
Since I was a kid, I’ve had to manage my asthma. I just have a mild case, but I know that some substances might make it worse. Of course secondhand smoke from cigarettes counts as well.
At least they have the decency to ask if the smoke bothers you before you turn completely blue from it. Those that sit and deliberately blow it in my direction have my utmost loathing.
Cigarette smoke contains a wide variety of compounds, some of which can also be found in other common household items.
To bind rubber with butane.
Asphalt made from tar
Poisonous to rats, arsenic
Ammonia, found in common cleaning supplies
Rocket fuel is methanol.
Remove nail polish using acetone. “I need to use the ATM again.”
I’d have a lot of quarters if I had one for every time I heard this phrase used in a casino.
It’s not uncommon for gamblers to act like lunatics in casinos, placing massive wagers while having little idea how to play their chosen game properly. When they are short on cash, they know just what to do: withdraw more money from the ATM.
This is not only foolish, but it can quickly lead to financial ruin. This is why gambling establishments typically have ATMs available for patrons’ use.
It’s also an insult to the idea of managing one’s financial resources. Play only with money you can afford to lose; never use funds set aside for necessities like food, rent, or your kid’s college fund.
Casino gambling is difficult since a hot streak may turn into a nightmare in an instant. Gamblers learn to take the good with the bad because it’s all a part of the game.
While gamers learn to deal with the ups and downs of the industry, there are certain cliches and phrases that can irritate even the most seasoned pro. If you yell this at Doyle Brunson as he rides by on his scooter, he may try to run you over.